If people don't know something, why do they pretend that they know it? It just makes them look stupid.
I wrote the above on 19th Oct 2007, and didn't post it. Found this in my draft. I still believe in it!
19 October 2007
Things to think
If people don't know something, why do they pretend that they know it? It just makes them look stupid.
16 October 2007
Saturday
I am suddenly missing the internet. I just want to sit and browse. Its almost 1 in the night, a Saturday night, and I am unable to sleep. I just finished watching a movie - The lookout. It was a crappy movie, but I watched the whole thing anyways. I should not have slept in the afternoon. That was really stupid. I was so lazy the whole day, didn't want to do anything, so I slept. I knew this was gonna happen, me unable to sleep, and yeah. It did.
It is either that I slept too much during the day, or I am thinking too much. Yesterday was so bad, I dont know when I will get over it. I am trying to, and there are so many things that remind me of yesterday. Ugh. Oh well, we all had decided to go to a place called Pamukkale. The place was ok and everything, so why it was bad for me, you ask? I lost my phone in the bus. I can't believe I could be so irresponsible. I see people losing their things, and I would wonder how it was even possible. And then, I did it myself. That sucks man. It really does. It was just like 11 months old, and I liked it so much. The even worse thing is that I spent 21 liras the day before to get a SIM card, and to get my phone registered. I had not done this before - getting the phone registered. You can’t use a SIM card in a foreign phone for more than 20 days. So I thought I will get a SIM card, and get the phone registered. And now, I have no phone. What the hell?
Ok, but that is not all why the day was bad. I decided to forget about it (losing the phone thing) then, not think so much about a phone, and decided to enjoy the day. They all asked if I was ok, and yeah, I felt ok. Even though I lost my damn phone I was gonna enjoy the day! So yeah, we walked around in that place, and we were clicking photos and such. And then it happened. I asked my friend to take a snap of mine. And I was giving her my camera. She reached out for it. And it fell. Down. On the calcium deposits. Which was like rock. The camera is just 2 months old, man. Shit! Like losing my phone was not enough. I thought I was gonna start crying or something. I didn't. Phew. I didn’t even reach out for the camera when it fell. I was just standing there. My friend picked it up, and tried to make it work. Switch off the camera, and switch it on again. Yeah right. Soon everyone was around that camera trying to do something. I just sat down on that dumb rock. I was numb. Someone then did something and it was atleast showing the pictures that I took. But the lens was stuck, and so the camera is not working. I just told them to forget it, and packed the camera back in the bag. And I just sat there.
I told the others to be careful. I said I might die today, take care of me. Ha ha. It was funny then. I don’t expect it to be funny now. No, it isn’t. Ah, I laughed then.
And now, after mid night, I am reminded of my phone. Motorola V3i. All my favourite songs were in that phone. Damn it. I will miss it. All that remains now, are my ear phones, the data cord, and the cover. I was listening to music in the bus from the phone. When the stop came, when we had to get off the bus, I remember removing the ear phones and putting it into my bag. I don’t know what I did with the phone. I usually put it in my pocket, but I guess I didn’t. We had to take another bus. I realized that I didn’t have my phone when I got into the next bus. And when I realized that the phone was not in my pocket, I knew I had lost it. No point in searching everywhere, I was not gonna find it. My friend actually made me go to the bus and search there. I did, and obviously it was not there.
I don’t know which phone I will buy next, but I don’t see any other flip phone as good as that. But, I will not be buying another flip phone. Hmmm, and I don’t have an alarm no more. I gotta use the f****d up alarm clock that is there in the hotel room. It takes like five minutes to set the damn alarm.
I have been reading “Atlas Shrugged”. Did not read in the past 2 months, just started reading from 4 days. I want to finish the book before I return India. Since I got to know that I have to stay here for one more month, I thought of reading. I have read Fountain Head, and this book seems so similar to that one. Maybe it is just Ayn Rand. Or maybe its just me. The theme is the same, it seems so far. But then, I have just begun the book.
I don’t like the work that I am doing here. However, I am not able to decide exactly what I want. This will not get me anywhere. I realize that. I have always waited for things to happen. That was because I didn’t care. I didn’t care what I would do, when I would do, and how I would do it. I still don’t, I think. When the moment came, I would do it the best way I can. But then if I don’t like what I am doing, then I should start thinking about changing that. I don’t like thinking this. I keep evading this as much as possible.
Feeling sleepy now, so will sleep while I can. Duh.
It is either that I slept too much during the day, or I am thinking too much. Yesterday was so bad, I dont know when I will get over it. I am trying to, and there are so many things that remind me of yesterday. Ugh. Oh well, we all had decided to go to a place called Pamukkale. The place was ok and everything, so why it was bad for me, you ask? I lost my phone in the bus. I can't believe I could be so irresponsible. I see people losing their things, and I would wonder how it was even possible. And then, I did it myself. That sucks man. It really does. It was just like 11 months old, and I liked it so much. The even worse thing is that I spent 21 liras the day before to get a SIM card, and to get my phone registered. I had not done this before - getting the phone registered. You can’t use a SIM card in a foreign phone for more than 20 days. So I thought I will get a SIM card, and get the phone registered. And now, I have no phone. What the hell?
Ok, but that is not all why the day was bad. I decided to forget about it (losing the phone thing) then, not think so much about a phone, and decided to enjoy the day. They all asked if I was ok, and yeah, I felt ok. Even though I lost my damn phone I was gonna enjoy the day! So yeah, we walked around in that place, and we were clicking photos and such. And then it happened. I asked my friend to take a snap of mine. And I was giving her my camera. She reached out for it. And it fell. Down. On the calcium deposits. Which was like rock. The camera is just 2 months old, man. Shit! Like losing my phone was not enough. I thought I was gonna start crying or something. I didn't. Phew. I didn’t even reach out for the camera when it fell. I was just standing there. My friend picked it up, and tried to make it work. Switch off the camera, and switch it on again. Yeah right. Soon everyone was around that camera trying to do something. I just sat down on that dumb rock. I was numb. Someone then did something and it was atleast showing the pictures that I took. But the lens was stuck, and so the camera is not working. I just told them to forget it, and packed the camera back in the bag. And I just sat there.
I told the others to be careful. I said I might die today, take care of me. Ha ha. It was funny then. I don’t expect it to be funny now. No, it isn’t. Ah, I laughed then.
And now, after mid night, I am reminded of my phone. Motorola V3i. All my favourite songs were in that phone. Damn it. I will miss it. All that remains now, are my ear phones, the data cord, and the cover. I was listening to music in the bus from the phone. When the stop came, when we had to get off the bus, I remember removing the ear phones and putting it into my bag. I don’t know what I did with the phone. I usually put it in my pocket, but I guess I didn’t. We had to take another bus. I realized that I didn’t have my phone when I got into the next bus. And when I realized that the phone was not in my pocket, I knew I had lost it. No point in searching everywhere, I was not gonna find it. My friend actually made me go to the bus and search there. I did, and obviously it was not there.
I don’t know which phone I will buy next, but I don’t see any other flip phone as good as that. But, I will not be buying another flip phone. Hmmm, and I don’t have an alarm no more. I gotta use the f****d up alarm clock that is there in the hotel room. It takes like five minutes to set the damn alarm.
I have been reading “Atlas Shrugged”. Did not read in the past 2 months, just started reading from 4 days. I want to finish the book before I return India. Since I got to know that I have to stay here for one more month, I thought of reading. I have read Fountain Head, and this book seems so similar to that one. Maybe it is just Ayn Rand. Or maybe its just me. The theme is the same, it seems so far. But then, I have just begun the book.
I don’t like the work that I am doing here. However, I am not able to decide exactly what I want. This will not get me anywhere. I realize that. I have always waited for things to happen. That was because I didn’t care. I didn’t care what I would do, when I would do, and how I would do it. I still don’t, I think. When the moment came, I would do it the best way I can. But then if I don’t like what I am doing, then I should start thinking about changing that. I don’t like thinking this. I keep evading this as much as possible.
Feeling sleepy now, so will sleep while I can. Duh.
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